Blackhumouristpress's Blog

July 21, 2010

Wonder Drugs

            Officer Gomez, Sandra Gomez stood five feet six inches and had brown stubble for hair.  She had a strong jaw yet a very attractive face.  She became a Chicago Police officer five years back.  She served as a young Marine in Desert Storm in the early 1990’s.   As far as women police officers go, she looked butch but yet had a stunningly beautiful face.

            Sandra was a second generation Ecuadorian who looked European.  Her parents had left Ecuador when she was very young.  They had a hacienda like home in Quito that was equipped with servants.  The servants were poor Quechua Indians.  Three Indian women took care of the home and the children.  They wore big skirts and Fedora hats.  Her father heard from friends who did really well in United States with real estate and so the family moved to Chicago.  They moved to the United States and it really never turned out to be that lucrative for them.  Everyone thought that because of their last name, that they were Puerto Rican.  Sandra’s father considered changing their last name to Jensen, which is Norwegian for the son of Jen.  Sandra’s mother, who’s maiden name was Hidalgo, thought that taking on a Scandinavian name was ridiculous.  The family struggled like many immigrant families do but they were happy and well balanced.  Sandra’s family eventually went back to live in Quito where life was much slower and more patient with older people.

            Sandra started to lift weights towards the end of high school.  She had a boyfriend that would slap the back of her arm and laugh when it jiggled.  He told her that he loved Hispanic girls with a little meat on them.  He told her that he was not interested in skinny white girls.  Sandra one day saw her boyfriend coming out of a restaurant with a skinny white girl with blond hair, with her arm wrapped around his.  It had been weeks since he initiated sex between them and Sandra suspected something.  Sandra began to run everyday.  It was hard at first to run two blocks.  By the time she joined the Marines, she was able to run an eight minute mile. 

            Sandra like many women who had low opinions of themselves, felt that she could always do better.  Sandra discussed with an owner of the small store front gym that she would like to be more toned and more muscular.  This store front owner began to give her injections of a steroid that was purchased for dirt cheap in Mexico.  Within three months, Sandra was stronger and looked stronger.  Her stomach was defined and her arms were muscular.  Her breasts became domed shape rather than plump and full.  Sandra could run faster and lift more weights.  The gym owner told her how much money she could make on the side by doing wrestling and stripping aside from entering body building competitions.

 On Monday nights, the gym owner would rent out a suite at a luxurious downtown Chicago hotel and invite men to wrestle women like Sandra.  They would pay $200.00 an hour to writhe and wiggle on a rubber mat, covered with oil.  The same gym owner was able to convince the women to do lesbian porn movies too.  Sandra and the other women became hooked on the way they looked and the gym owner was their pimp.  Sandra’s job was to arrest people who took, sold and distributed other illegal drugs during work but she saw nothing wrong with what she was doing.

            “Sir… You the owner of this building?”  Asked Sandra while pointing her pen at Mort.

            “I’m just the manager of the building,” said Mort, while fixing his glasses, sporting a ball cap that read, “Bass fear me”.

            “I thought this guy here was the manager… What’s your name again?”

            Dwight replied.  Sandra asked to see his driver’s license because she thought he was trying to be funny.  Sandra had decided that if it was not his name, she was going to find a reason to bring him into the station.  Fortunately for Dwight, it was his name.

            “No, I’m the janitor, he’s the manager…  They need managers to watch the janitors and then the big boss watches everyone.  Nobody trusts each other… This is how it works. I don’t need him and he don’t need his boss but everyone need a job.”

            Sandra closed her eyes and held up her hand for Dwight to stop speaking.  The night before, she had wrestled a group of Japanese men who were executives for a drug company.  Their job was to come and tell the Americans who ran their company for them in the United States, that they were being bought out by another drug company and that 50% of the current workers would be let go.  Their company had just developed a drug that helped people with narcolepsy, stay awake.  It worked so well that young twenty something aged clubbers were using it so that they could stay up all night.  Their slogan was a catchy one.  They had a Charles Nelson Reilly look alike with a magic wand, spreading pixie dust over the head of some poor person who was unable to stay awake.

            “Wakie wakie, eggs and bakie…” said the Charles Nelson Reilly impersonator with a magic wand, while laughing hardily with a double chin.

            That became the catch phrase all over the United States and Canada.  The scientists had actually screwed up.  They were trying to make a drug that helped people with insomnia sleep.  It had the reverse effect.  Insomniacs were up for days and felt great as if they had slept.  One of the scientist decided to try it on narcoleptics and voila.  One billion dollars in tests for the FDA and the fledgling drug company had struck gold.  On billboards, on the sides of busses, on the radio and television, was the distinct laugh of Charles Nelson Reilly, a moderately famous dead actor who was flamboyant yet funny. 

 Those who worked for the company thought that they were secure.  The three Japanese men were there to bust the bubble.  There was another company that was purchasing them and only needed a portion of the work force.  C’est la vie.

            Sandra had to wrestle the three hatchet men from Japan men who were in their early thirties.  Through their interpreter, they asked Sandra if it would be possible to have sex with her at the same time.  They were willing to pay her close to $3,000.00.  For them it was a deal since their money was exchanged from Euros.  Sandra declined.  They offered her and extra $1,000.00 if they could masturbate on her.  She went along with that.  The gym owner had cameras set up in the room and caught every second of it.  It became his promotional film for Japanese executives.  It was on the internet but was not easy to find.  Sandra never found out.  Sandra was towelling the spew off of herself at roughly one in the morning while the three Japanese men, grinned like fools and bowed to her as she got dressed and exited the hotel room.  The money was helping Sandra to buy her dream house along the shores of Lake Michigan.  She had several thousand saved in certificates of deposits.  She was a million away but getting closer all the time.  The dream house was designed by Frank Lloyd Wright back in the twenties.  It was a swell looking abode. 

            Sandra took her notes of the robbery at the building and left.  She had two hours left on her shift.  With under an hour to go, she would be called to a dumpster where a baby was found dead.  A teenaged mother, fearful of losing her twenty four year old heroin addict boyfriend, put her newborn baby in a plastic bag and threw the baby in the dumpster behind her building.  A homeless man looking for scrap metal and scrap food, found a catatonic new born in a plastic bag.  Sandra experienced many heinous things as a Marine and as a police officer, but that one took the cake.  Sandra worked an extra four hours.  She was the one who had to take into custody the young woman who suffocated her week old child.  In the apartment was a small child, watching Miley Cyrus on the Disney Channel, while sitting on a urine stained mattress in a bedroom.  Sandra fought hard not to break down and cry.  She told herself that it was a job that somebody had to do and it was one that she signed on for and that anything and everything would be possible.

            “Hey sweetie…  We’re going to go for a ride, okay?” Said Sandra.

            “I want to finish watching Hannah Montana though,” said a cute little girl who was almost seven years old.

            “I know honey…  But we really need to take a ride now.  I promise you’ll get to watch your show again soon,” said Sandra.

            “It’s my favorite show…  I want to be like her when I grow up,” said the small girl.

            “Yeah?  I think I wanted to be Wonder Woman…  We gotta go now.”

  Life always looks so much better on television.

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