Blackhumouristpress's Blog

October 31, 2013

Disney for Adults or Debauchery in Detroit

Filed under: Detroit,humor,Short Story — blackhumouristpress @ 7:36 am
Tags: , , , ,

A good idea is really a good idea and leaves others to ponder why it was they didn’t think about it first. A place that serves coffee like heroin to addicts who need a fix just to function. A great idea worth a billion.
Now Thomas Washington, no relation to George Washington or Thomas Jefferson, bought land in Detroit for pennies on the dollar. After winning the Powerball at a party store on Livernois and some other street you don’t know or care about in Detroit, Thomas, who was living in his mother’s beat up two bedroom house south of 8 mile, bought a bottle of Thorn Rose sweet red wine and a Powerball ticket. Thomas’ chances of being hit by a satellite on a motorcycle travelling 62.5 miles an hour or 100 kilometers, which ever you prefer, was greater than landing the single ticket worth a half billion. Call it destiny with divinity.
Now Thomas reasoned that his town wasn’t such a bad town. It used to be a good town and upon visiting Las Vegas for a weekend and a week in Dubai, Thomas decided that buying vacant land in Detroit and turning into a Disney for adults or debauchery in Detroit, was a way of turning millions into billions.
After a few hotels and casinos popped up in northwest Detroit where a man-made lake was lined with love cabins and getaway destinations for lovers and others, big time investment followed. Soon came MMA matches, live sex shows and donkey shows. There were video game arcades for adults where they could redeem tickets to have relations with women from around the world or for hunks from next door. Hookah dens with hash and Marijuana, MTV reality shows, 5 star restaurants packed with stars and those wanting to be stars. Fake beaches and fake people flocked to Detroit to make the scene. Las Vegas became a subdued ghost town.
Forbes had a picture of a beautiful hotel overlooking a shimmering lake with a young woman in a thong wading in knee deep water. The caption read, “Detroit- The key to America’s renaissance”. The author of the article commented on how it took a genius to tap into the hidden desires of man to create a vacationland of hidden fantasies for people from around the world. Thomas Washington was pictured in a bowler hat and a cane lined with diamonds, dressed in a suit which was handmade by a man in Italy who charged $20,000.00. Thomas took a puff of a Cohiba, took a sip from a $1,000.00 a bottle cognac in a gold rimmed glass. Thomas picked tobacco or lint off of his tongue before contouring his razor thin moustache and speaking in a quietly smooth voice. He paused ten seconds before answering the journalist which only made Thomas seem deeper than he was.
“People are gonna do what they gonna do. I just make it fashionable to be a pig. When you have money, you a deep motherfucker. When you ain’t got a pot to piss in, you jus a dirty motherfucker… And that’s jus how shit is.

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