Blackhumouristpress's Blog

July 3, 2019

The 4th Of July


Nike might be likely to incite thee.

Kaepernick the flag in the nick of time to celebrate independence. Mike Pence, polls twice a day and the electorate is on the fence. Toxic hate of illegal residents and on the other side against the president. I’ll take the fifth on the forth.


It’s legal now- take hit. Mellow out- that’s it. Drink, gamble and smoke. Now here’s the real joke- that skunky shit ain’t your granddaddy’s dope. You can deny the gateway as they search for the right way to balance the books and pay for it all. Want a preview? Here’s a clue of what they’d do for you- those that stood for the debate weren’t even second rate in the eyes that watched and glazed over.


Meanwhile over at the DMZ, Little Kim for a photo op, hoping a handshake might stop radiation over South Korea and Japan. Sweat trickles down my back, Iranian uranium is back on track. The time draws closer. It’s too hot, it’s too wet and maybe there is a problem at the border. Those poor people drinking water from a commode, while the nation angrily might implode like it did once back with Lincoln. It all just leaves me thinking. There will be a military review that’s not meant for you this 4th of July. A show of strength with troops and tanks like Red Square on May Day… May day… May day. We going down…

August 17, 2015

Winds of Potential Change

Filed under: humor,humour — blackhumouristpress @ 11:54 am
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Television blares images- the princess holding her baby is apprehensive, pensive look towards Calais

Knowing there is no way to change the ebb and flow of those who

Run from their kingdom- a mass of human destruction called Syria

Serious wringing of hands over construction of nuclear matter- does it matter?

You get a bomb, they got a bomb we have a bomb and the anxiety of what’s yet

To come.

If you conserve we preserve Federal Reserve and reservations for the indigenous and a

Prestigious candidate debating waiting for him implode to meet his fate propped by polls by those

Who see the holes in the road leading around the bend back to where we stand in the slipping

Sand- building Berlinish walls at the Rio Grande for the Grand Old Party going the way of Whigs

Stand tall and shake a big twig for the greatest country you never met- Tremendous debt and a genuflect towards a Chinese syndrome of the purchase of consumer not-so-goods

Come back to bed, dear- it’s only the wind of potential change in the age of climate changing back to the times of dinosaurs, pre-historic ingenuity- igneous, porous blind faith in the ability of the electorate to find the protectorate of this really great way of living- with liberty and justice for all… or at least some.

March 15, 2012

1933 Again

Filed under: humor,obama — blackhumouristpress @ 6:23 am
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The president, a precedent plays a violin at the funeral pyre in a

Quagmire, bonfire Koran, Iran and Little Kim has a little hand on the button

In a strange land north of Seoul.


I don’t know what we don’t know and there are things we know we know.

Election year- vote for so and so– there are things we do not know that we don’t know- goo goo j’goob.


I’m a 99, you’re a 99.  They got yours, they got mine.

It’s futile like feudal between haves and halves of halves and fractions of factions and commercial break distractions.


G8- ain’t it grand? Liquid gold in the sand to be mobile or Mobil/Exxon

the hex on the White House and greenhouse gas.


The hero is zero, living intestate with a falling interest rate

Trying to compensate for millions losing their estate.  So what’s our fate?


We have nothing to fear but fear itself

October 3, 2009

And the Nobel Peace Prize Goes to … Oprah

Filed under: Oprah,Short Story — blackhumouristpress @ 5:51 am
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Oprah flew in late in the day from Copenhagen to Chicago and was taken by her driver to her condominium in Water Tower Place on Michigan Avenue in the heart of downtown Chicago’s retail Mecca.

“I told you Chicago, Chicago… Do you understand that? Its 2000 miles away from California… Just stay there with the damn dogs… Yes, yes… I got another call coming in. Stay there with the dogs, I’ll be home on Saturday,” said Oprah while holding her temples with her left thumb and middle finger while speaking to one of many assistants at the White House.

“Look, when he gets back I need to talk to him about all this Olympic garbage. It’s been a colossal waste of my time and has done nothing but hurt my stature. The god damn mayor drags me to Europe to help land this thing and we’re bumped in the first damn round? How does this happen? How is it we don’t get Jordan in on this whole thing?”

Oprah’s shoes clop and click and keep time with her nylon stockings that rub against one another as she angrily walks to the private elevator that leads to an entire floor which is her home while in Chicago, working on her show.

“What the hell is the name of that damn fool in Iran? Amad, Amoo… How do you say it? Okay then… Amadinejhad and Netanyahu… You let him know that I want to be the one to broker a peace deal between them. It’s pretty clear if something isn’t done soon, they’re going to have functional nukes and the Jews will wind up doing something. This way we make a pre-emptive move … Exactly, exactly… Yup and then I at least am in the running for a Nobel Prize and everyone forgets about this and the damn Michigan Avenue extravaganza we had back in September… James Taylor? It’s a long story. I owed a favor to Carly Simon… So did they say when they were getting back? Okay… Well no I don’t hold the president responsible for this and I’m not blaming him or Michelle. It’s just when you get involved in these things and you attach your name to them and they flop… Exactly, exactly… It’s symbolic. That’s exactly it… I don’t need this looming over me now. A big loss today and I need a big win tomorrow. You have him get this going. We’ll meet in Iceland where Reagan met with Gorbachev way back when… Right, right. I think if we can get this solved between those two countries, it might be possible to get some of the moderate elements in the Taliban to maybe do a Skype from Afghanistan where we look at the war from their prospective… I know, it’s just really upsetting and frankly very embarrassing. I usually try to stay out of these things but they asked me and now I’m asking them to help me save face and I think this could really help them, the nation and the world. If Frost could talk to Nixon then I think I could work out this nuclear issue between Amah, Amoo… How do you say that name again? Okay, in any event, I need a call tomorrow once they’ve had a chance to unwind. This has to happen quickly. Fox news is having a field day with this whole thing… Okay then, you take care… Buh bye,” said Oprah while hanging up.

Oprah stood at the window looking north along the shore of Lake Michigan as the sun began to rise. She took a sip of water and swirled the ice cubes in the glass.

“Amah-dinah-jad, Amah-dinah-jad… I better write that down. I’ll forget how to say that by the morning.”

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